I Hate You – Don’t Leave Me: Understanding The Borderline Personality

I Hate You–Don’t Leave Me
by Jerold J. Kreisman, Hal Straus

A revised and updated edition of the bestselling guide to understanding borderline personality disorder.

After more than two decades as the essential guide to Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), this new edition now reflects the most up- to-date research that has opened doors to the neurobiological, genetic, and developmental roots of the disorder as well as connections between BPD and substance abuse, sexual abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome, ADHD, and eating disorders.

Both pharmacological and psychotherapeutic advancements point to real hope for success in the treatment and understanding of BPD.

This expanded and revised edition remains as accessible and useful as its predecessor and will reestablish this book as the go-to source for those diagnosed with BPD, their family, friends, and colleagues, as well as professionals and students in the field.


I Hate You– Don’t Leave Me
by Jerold Jay Kreisman, Hal Straus

A revised and updated edition of the bestselling guide to understanding borderline personality disorder.

After more than two decades as the essential guide to Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), this new edition now reflects the most up- to-date research that has opened doors to the neurobiological, genetic, and developmental roots of the disorder as well as connections between BPD and substance abuse, sexual abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome, ADHD, and eating disorders.

Both pharmacological and psychotherapeutic advancements point to real hope for success in the treatment and understanding of BPD.

This expanded and revised edition remains as accessible and useful as its predecessor and will reestablish this book as the go-to source for those diagnosed with BPD, their family, friends, and colleagues, as well as professionals and students in the field.


I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me
by Jerold Jay Kreisman, Hal Straus

“AM I LOSING MY MIND?”

People with Borderline Personality Disorderexperience such violent and frightening mood swingsthat they often fear for their sanity. They can beeuphoric one moment, despairing and depressed thenext. There are an estimated 10 million sufferersof BPD living in America today — each displayingremarkably similar symptoms:

  • a shaky sense of identity
  • sudden violent outbursts
  • oversensitivity to real or imagined rejection
  • brief, turbulent love affairs
  • frequent periods of intense depression
  • eating disorders, drug abuse, and other
    self-destructive tendencies
  • an irrational fear of abandonment and an
    inability to be alone

For years BPD was difficult to describe, diagnose, andtreat. But now, for the first time, Dr. Jerold J. Kreismanand health writer Hal Straus offer much-neededprofessional advice, helping victims and their familiesto understand and cope with this troubling,shockingly widespread affliction.


Sometimes I Act Crazy
by Jerold J. Kreisman, M.D., Hal Straus

A source of hope, expert advice, and guidance for people withborderline personality disorder and those who love them

Do you experience frightening, often violent mood swings that makeyou fear for your sanity? Are you often depressed? Do you engage inself-destructive behaviors such as drug or alcohol abuse, anorexia,compulsive eating, self-cutting, and hair pulling? Do you feelempty inside, or as if you don’t know who you are? Do you dreadbeing alone and fear abandonment? Do you have trouble finishingprojects, keeping a job, or forming lasting relationships?

If you or someone you love answered yes to the majority of thesequestions, there’s a good chance that you or that person suffersfrom borderline personality disorder, a commonly misunderstood andmisdiagnosed psychological problem afflicting tens of millions ofpeople. Princess Diana was one of the most well-known BPDsufferers.

As a source of hope and practical advice for BPD sufferers andthose who love them, this new book by Dr. Jerold J. Kreisman andHal Straus, bestselling authors of I Hate You, Don’t Leave Me,offers proven techniques that help you:
* Manage mood swings
* Develop lasting relationships
* Improve your self-esteem
* Keep negative thoughts at bay
* Control destructive impulses
* Understand your treatment options
* Find professional help


Get Me Out of Here
by Rachel Reiland

With astonishing honesty, this memoir reveals what mental illness looks and feels like from the inside, and how healing from borderline personality disorder is possible through intensive therapy and the support of loved ones.

With astonishing honesty, this memoir, Get Me Out of Here, reveals what mental illness looks and feels like from the inside, and how healing from borderline personality disorder is possible through intensive therapy and the support of loved ones. A mother, wife, and working professional, Reiland was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder at the age of 29–a diagnosis that finally explained her explosive anger, manipulative behaviors, and self-destructive episodes including bouts of anorexia, substance abuse, and promiscuity. A truly riveting read with a hopeful message.Excerpt: “My hidden secrets were not well-concealed. The psychological profile had been right as had the books on BPD. I was manipulative, desperately clinging and prone to tantrums, explosiveness, and frantic acts of desperation when I did not feel the intimacy connection was strong enough. The tough chick loner act of self-reliance was a complete facade.”


Loving Someone with Borderline Personality Disorder
by Shari Y. Manning

People with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can be intensely caring, warm, smart, and funny—but their behavior often drives away those closest to them. If you’re struggling in a tumultuous relationship with someone with BPD, this is the book for you. Dr. Shari Manning helps you understand why your spouse, family member, or friend has such out-of-control emotions—and how to change the way you can respond. Learn to use simple yet powerful strategies that can defuse crises, establish better boundaries, and radically transform your relationship. Empathic, hopeful, and science based, this is the first book for family and friends grounded in dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), the most effective treatment for BPD.


The Borderline Personality Disorder
by Alex Chapman and Kim Gratz

The Borderline Personality Disorder Survival Guide is organized as a series of answers to questions common to BPD sufferers: What is BPD? How long does it last? What other problems co-occur with BPD? Overviews what we currently know about BPD make up the first section of the book. Later chapters cover several common treatment approaches to BPD: dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), mentalization-based therapy (MBT), and medical treatment using psychoactive drugs. In the last sections of the book, readers learn a range of day-to-day coping skills that can help moderate the symptoms of BPD.

Understanding the Borderline Mother
by Christine Ann Lawson

The first love in our lives is our mother. Recognizing her face, her voice, the meaning of her moods, and her facial expressions is crucial to survival. Dr. Christine Ann Lawson vividly describes how mothers who suffer from borderline personality disorder produce children who may flounder in life even as adults, futilely struggling to reach the safety of a parental harbor, unable to recognize that their borderline parent lacks a pier, or even a discernible shore. Four character profiles describe different symptom clusters that include the waif mother, the hermit mother, the queen mother, and the witch. Children of borderlines are at risk for developing this complex and devastating personality disorder themselves. Dr. Lawson’s recommendations for prevention include empathic understanding of the borderline mother and early intervention with her children to ground them in reality and counteract the often dangerous effects of living with a “make-believe” mother. Some readers may recognize their mothers as well as themselves in this book. They will also find specific suggestions for creating healthier relationships. Addressing the adult children of borderlines and the therapists who work with them, Dr. Lawson shows how to care for the waif without rescuing her, to attend to the hermit without feeding her fear, to love the queen without becoming her subject, and to live with the witch without becoming her victim. A Jason Aronson Book

The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder
by Randi Kreger

"Randi Kreger has done it again! With her new book, she continues to make the dynamics of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) readily accessible to those of us who love, live with and treat people who suffer from this complex condition." Blaise Aguirre, MD, Medical Director, Adolescent Dialectical Behavior Therapy Residential Program, McLean Hospital

"Kreger’s communication techniques, grounded in the latest research, provide family members with the essential ability to regain a genuine, meaningful relationship with their loved one with Borderline Personality Disorder." Debra Resnick, Psy.D., President, Psychological Services and Human Development Center

"This book offers hope for those who think their situation has none." Rachel Reiland, author of Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder

For family members of people with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), home life is routinely unpredictable and frequently unbearable. Extreme mood swings, impulsive behaviors, unfair blaming and criticism, and suicidal tendencies common conduct among those who suffer from the disorder leave family members feeling confused, hurt, and helpless.

In Stop Walking on Eggshells, Randi Kreger’s pioneering first book which sold more than 340,000 copies, she and co-author Paul T. Mason outlined the fundamental differences in the way that people with BPD relate to the world. Now, with The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder, Kreger takes readers to the next level by offering them five straightforward tools to organize their thinking, learn specific skills, and focus on what they need to do to get off the emotional rollercoaster: Take care of yourself Uncover what keeps you feeling stuck Communicate to be heard Set limits with love Reinforce the right behaviors

Together the steps provide a clear-cut system designed to help friends and family reduce stress, improve their relationship with their borderline loved one, improve their problem-solving skills and minimize conflict, and feel more self-assured about setting limits.

Randi Kreger is the co-author of Stop Walking on Eggshells and the author of The Stop Walking on Eggshells Workbook. She operates bpdcentral.com, one of the top web-based resources for those living with BPD, and runs the Welcome to Oz online family support groups based at her web site. Cofounder of the Personality Disorder Awareness Network, Kreger is frequently invited to lecture on BPD and related issues, both for clinicians and laypeople.


Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder
by Valerie Porr, M.A.

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is characterized by unstable moods, negative self-image, dangerous impulsivity, and tumultuous relationships. Many people with BPD excel in academics and careers while revealing erratic, self-destructive, and sometimes violent behavior only to those with whom they are intimate. Others have trouble simply holding down a job or staying in school. Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder is a compassionate and informative guide to understanding this profoundly unsettling–and widely misunderstood–mental illness, believed to affect approximately 6% of the general population. Rather than viewing people with BPD as manipulative opponents in a bitter struggle, or pitying them as emotional invalids, Valerie Porr cites cutting-edge science to show that BPD is a true neurobiological disorder and not, as many come to believe, a character flaw or the result of bad parenting. Porr then clearly and accessibly explains what BPD is, which therapies have proven effective, and how to rise above the weighty stigma associated with the disorder. Offering families and loved ones supportive guidance that both acknowledges the difficulties they face and shows how they can be overcome, Porr teaches empirically-supported and effective coping behaviors and interpersonal skills, such as new ways of talking about emotions, how to be aware of nonverbal communication, and validating difficult experiences. These skills are derived from Dialectical Behavior Therapy and Mentalization-based Therapy, two evidence-based treatments that have proven highly successful in reducing family conflict while increasing trust. Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder is an empowering and hopeful resource for those who wish to gain better understanding of the BPD experience–and to make use of these insights in day-to-day family interactions. Winner of the ABCT Self Help Book Seal of Merit Award 2011

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